Feeling stupid


Having an argument with myself yesterday.   Iwas feeling down and out of sorts.  I am trying to move forward. I am trying to ignore the chemically manufactured voices i was hearing.  That had been slowly getting louder this past week.  Reading this makes me sound certifyable.

I feel exhausted today.  I hurt like I have had a wicked work out yesterday – and I did not- its been a couple of days since I did a good work out.  That is tonights plan- maybe.  Depression is a full body work out.  It effects the brain the body and all the rest of it.   How is my mind today.  It is better I am still a little off – I am more angry with myself for some late night texting to a friend.  One of my rules is when I am out of sorts I do not text at night.  The problem is I don’t remember stuff.  I  woke up and realized that I had text my friend and for the life of me I could not remember what I said.  So you can imagion how frightening it is to read your texts from the night before and wonder what the heck I said now! 

On the other hand – I am lucky to have friends that care. 

Oh Lord help me cope, help me to relax and not panic, help me to hear your voice and help me to carry on each day to your Glory.

Amen

till next time………………

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