friday


Friday the day eveyone works for, well most everyone. Weekend a time to relax spend time with friends, family sleep.
Everything one looks forward to – is not happening this friday for me. I only include friday not Sat or Sun in it because I am only going to qualify this day. This day in a word, HELL of a day. I felt jittery this morning. I told myself I will not feel this way today. It is the first day of Sem 2 at my school I work at, my daughter is starting there today and had a great day. Its all good. It turned out to be a jittery, anxious, day. I ended up taking two anxiety pills and it still didn’t bring me down. My heart has been racing most of the day. I am having trouble keeping it together. In reality I have been feeling hyper I can’t think straight. tonight I am home with my husband — I feel like getting in the car and driving — where I do not care but I feel like a caged animal. I need to get out. so what i am doing? sitting here with my husband drinking wine ( which does not mix with the meds but I don’t give a dam tonight) I just want to come down and feel relaxed .
No demons, no voices. I just can’t settle. I shake and I hate the unsettled feeling I feel.
Life with depression ——-dam it
till next time

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